We don’t spend nearly enough time taking a moment to be pleased with our writing—a description that satisfies, an evocative phrase, one damn good sentence.
Please take that moment now and post something you’re pleased with. And let us celebrate with you! It’s hard to do what we do.
Thanks, Cristina. Here's a sentence from a new story I'm working on, Air Cubana: "The weekend after I was back in the States I stood on the shores of the inlet near my house, calm water from the Atlantic at low tide, the sun above, and I told myself, This sun shines this moment in Havana, this water laps the shores of the Malecón, those I care about in Cuba are back into their bubble, but I can communicate in the dream time, I can send thoughts and love to them and someone may appear and talk with me, give me information I need; I have opened a pathway, I can return. "
I love the idea of the simultaneity of two strands of reality. Here you are building a bridge between the two. I would want to read on. And that's the thing you want most of all; that the reader keep reading.
Thanks, Cristina. Here's a sentence from a new story I'm working on, Air Cubana: "The weekend after I was back in the States I stood on the shores of the inlet near my house, calm water from the Atlantic at low tide, the sun above, and I told myself, This sun shines this moment in Havana, this water laps the shores of the Malecón, those I care about in Cuba are back into their bubble, but I can communicate in the dream time, I can send thoughts and love to them and someone may appear and talk with me, give me information I need; I have opened a pathway, I can return. "
The simultaneities of place and the "dream time" that connects them are beautifully done! BRAVA, JANE!!
I love the idea of the simultaneity of two strands of reality. Here you are building a bridge between the two. I would want to read on. And that's the thing you want most of all; that the reader keep reading.
Agreed!
“Seated at a terrace cafe, Teymour felt as unlucky as a flea on a bald man’s head.” Opening line of "A Splendid Conspiracy" by Albert Cossery.
Haha! Love this ...
Of all the many things lacking in Evaristo Gonzalez's life, the one he lacked most was stature.
Ah, there's a whole world in this sentence! Thanks so much for sharing, Dahlma!!